By Angel Simmons

In December, I told my Bestie that my motto this new year would be “I’m just NOT!”. I think a more polite way to describe what I mean is “I won’t have time”. Please note that there is a SIGNIFICANT difference between “don’t” and “won’t”. In this case, I’m not just saying that my time is too limited or restricted. What I am indeed saying is that even if I HAD the time, I simply refuse to engage or participate in WHATEVER it is in question. In order to hold on to my JOY, I need to be highly selective of where I exert my energy!

To commemorate my 40th Birthday, I’m sharing a condensed list of things (with brief commentary!) that people over forty no longer have the time for. LEAN IN!

This is an insult to my beauty sleep, as I have no real bedtime… because I’m 40.

Why? All day long, they force you to keep bending over at awkward moments!

I recently stopped carrying my make-up stash EVERYWHERE that I go. Whatever I put on at 7am needs to last ’til evening.

If I wasn’t there or I’m not in your photos, STOP using MY page to advertise YOUR stuff!

It’s inappropriate. I’m tired of explaining why.

It is a waste of space in my cup… and too hard on my teeth.

I have a special series coming up for survivors… STAY TUNED!

I can’t keep up! I’m SO proud, but it’s difficult supporting your newest “launch” every year! I do ‘wanna be your first and best customer, but I don’t need anymore soap or earrings or slimming shakes or shea butter right now!

NOPE. I want meat. I’ll get my own.

I am the ONLY one… NOT number one OR one of many! If you thought so, CLEARLY, I’m not significant enough to you. Also, liars and cheaters need not apply.

Yes… I am a model, but don’t care how cute they are or if they’re on clearance if I have to limp around the room!

Don’t ask my opinion on food, clothing, ideas or people if you don’t want the truth. I WILL be kind, but I WON’T lie about it.

I told you… I’m hungry. One hour can turn into three far too easily, and I am not responsible for my behavior after 59 minutes of starvation.

I strip at the front door… Don’t judge me!

I understand the daily injustice of black and brown people, women, the impoverished, disadvantaged, disabled and mentally ill. If you DON’T understand or speak up about it in public spaces in the company of those that look like you, we cannot be in any kind of relationship.

If it doesn’t feed my soul, or I can’t bump it in my car or play it publicly, then it serves me no purpose.

My car rolled away twice and NO ONE saw a THING, but ‘yall always watching when I’m outside walking and ‘gettin my thickness in order!

It’s disrespectful, dishonorable and disgusting. Furthermore, it’s a reflection of YOU and a contributing factor in why your marriage has trouble. Lastly, marriage is my heart’s desire. You are a horrible and unfit spokesperson. Stop telling folk that you know God.

My skin is soft. It’s also spoiled and requires certain accommodations.

Aside from times necessary to keep peace and without being rude, I will speak out when prompted to communicate my feelings, oppose mistreatment and correct ill behavior. I am 40 years old! I’ve been silent long enough.

I considered making this a list of 40 things, but I don’t have time for THAT!

TELL US… What else would YOU add to the list?

July 17, 2018