By Angel Simmons ©
Someone asked me yesterday what my flaws were. My first thought was “Do you really want to know???” The natural response is if you know what your problem is, why haven’t you just fixed your problem? I hesitated for a moment- not out of fear, but because of revelation. I have learned these last few years how differently the world operates than the Kingdom. And in turn, people don’t value character and virtue according to the principles in the Word.
I love hard. I support people. I care deeply. I expect relationships to be meaningful. I think real friendships are to be lifelong. I believe marriage is forever. I trust people until they give me a reason not to. I value what I do more than what I get paid to do it. Sadly, all of these things have been labeled as a “flaw” of mine by someone. And if ever asked, I unloaded the same list- not realizing what each of them was really worth. At some point, the world decided that the willingness to give and sacrifice was a weakness. But the Word shows us these two as love’s great design. Our lack of revelation has caused heartbreak and death in grave numbers- both physically and relationally. And instead of spreading the truth and healing the world, we go and conform to their lower standards of living.
My list has since changed. Because of how hard I love and care for and support people, I tend to have higher expectations than most. Because of my view on trust and relationships, I’m extremely cautious and analytical of the motives of people’s hearts. Because of my upbringing and my passion, I’m a bit defensive about having to explain why I do all that I do and why I’m doing it all the time. I pride myself on staying humble, but my gifts make me stand out and usually end up on the stage or the runway. I refuse to be anything other than transparent, but only share my “scars” when asked. And even when I’m left hurt and betrayed, I pick my heart up off the floor and take it in for repairs because I know that I’ll need to share it again with another.
I’m a work in progress… an ever-evolving, constantly-moving, uniquely-created being. The truth is that I’m flawed in every possible way. So I take those flaws to God- who made me all kinds of beautiful. I pray that they be transformed into something He can use for His glory. I realize that a perfect imperfection is the best I’ll ever be. And that doesn’t give me a warrant to harden my heart or embrace the “as is” that I am… but to run quickly towards the “I AM” who created me for greatness and to be salt and light in this earth… flaws and all.
July 30, 2014